PARTY ON WAYNE

Written by  ,     July 26, 2013     Posted in Restaurant, The Lighter Side

Folk Festival weekend is finally upon us, for the 20th year in a row at COBBLESTONES.  And, once again, rain gets factored into the equation, though “factored” and “equation” don’t actually mean a whole lot–because I’m not sure we actually DO much different.

Not, at least, since the last time we computed, and factored, and paid attention when the weathermen predicted 0% chance of rain on a Sunday. Have you heard THAT rant yet?  0%?!  That’s right…zero.  So, we bought “hundreds of dollars” worth of restock for Sunday…and what happened? It rained all damn day!  A wash out, from, seriously, ZERO PERCENT!  Is anything, I mean ANYTHING, in life–aside from the opposite of life itself, guaranteed? And…THE WEATHER?! Are you kidding , me?  (OK…you’ve now heard it…apologies to those who have…many times…)

FYI…they STILL quote 0% at times!  Ay caramba!  JUST SAY 1%!!!!  But never, ever, ever, say zero. 1% allows for “oops.”  Zero percent just makes you look like an idiot.  (if simply, for stating 0%)  Ok, sorry, there was more…back to today…

So anyway, it will, or it won’t, rain.  (Right NOW…raining…a lot…)

It will, or it won’t, make a difference.  (we will or we won’t move the band inside…)

But, you know since the beginning, rain has occupied our thoughts, and 20 years later, I still wake up at 4:30am with the weathermen on my mind…the very 1st thought of my day.  Though, today, for the 1st time ever perhaps..I was actually smiling, with a whole new persepctive!

I was thinking…imagine, being a weatherman…at a cocktail party!  Imagine, how much grief they must get, how much that can suck–despite being paid to use science and technology, to be no more certain than a flip of a coin!

Here’s what was on my semi-conscious, waking mind, that made me smile an hour ago…

In the scheme of life and professions, in terms of enjoying a cocktail party…

I imagine it doesn’t get much better than being a proffessional athlete.  (Excluding Bill Buckner)  Adulation, autographs, pats on the back– a real star.  Actors and actresses, too, and maybe once upon a time, dinosaurs, astronauts and politicians enjoyed such awe.

People probably smile immediately at the sight of a comedian in a social setting.

It’s not bad being a restaurant owner or chef at a party, I can tell you from experience.  People these days, love talking about restaurants, both the romance of food and beverage, and also, the respect of “..such a hard business” (Thank you Prudhomme, Julia, Emeril, Bourdain…)

Probably, circus people and zoo keepers receive great admiration and a kind curiosity.

Firemen and police… A constant “heroes welcome”

Hell…undertakers take care of families in crisis, are there at the end, and I am sure they receive great respect, gentle pats and hugs, when socializing casually. (probably not too many questions though!)

Now, imagine being a weatherman at a party!?  People smile at weathermen too, I am certain.  

But, you know what kind of smile that is, right!?  An “I caught you picking your nose” like smile.  A “your fly is open” smirk…there is toilet paper stuck to your foot kind of giddy. How many times do you think, when someone introduces a weatheman at a party, the person extends for a handshake, with a simultaneously growing haha-you-get -paid-to-suck style smile.  Can you hear the comments?  

“Good call Bob.”  “Damn Bob, most of us get paid to be RIGHT!” “Hey Bob..what’s the weather going to be tomorrow?  WAIT.  I have a coin…” 

I have said it before, I will say it again…Mother nature’s gonna do what she do.  It makes no difference what we say or think or predict…sort of like the economy, actually, only 10 times worse… when you’re sitting on 3,000 hot dogs, sausages, and burgers!

We hope to see you tonight.  We will be there, smiling, doing what WE do… keeping buns dry!

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